Good morning ☀️

From trimmed tourism troughs to a presidential jet stolen by a president's son, there's never a dull moment in the news. Fasten your seatbelt and try to prevent the tomatoes from seeping out of your rolex.

Let's do this 🔥

— Gloria Mbabazi, Shem Opolot

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Headlines

National S*lim S*leh Fund? 🐷💰

The above headline was typed from the safety of an underground bunker in an undisclosed location, with 10 super-strength VPNs in place. As the NSSF drama persists, Betty Amongi and Matia Kasaijja, the ministers of Gender and Finance respectively, were summoned by the speaker to the parliament. If you're struggling to make sense of this kerfuffle, this article explains it well. We hope that the author has a bunker too.

Catching Feelings, not Flights 🛫

Half the motivation to become a minister, MP, or any high-ranking government official in Uganda vanished after President Museveni suddenly discovered austerity and issued a directive to ban foreign travel in a bid to cut government spending. Someone wave State House's daily budget in Mr. President's face; we want to see something.

Catching Bribes, not Boarding Passes 🛂

#UGTwitter was fizzing like a bottled and shaken Fanta this week when multiple reports and accusations of extortion at Entebbe International Airport were levied against Uganda Civil Aviation Authority (CAA). Setting an auspicious precedent for social media whistle-blowers and complainers, the CAA responded by posting the most ridiculous press release we've seen, firing some staff members, and launching investigations into the allegations. Next, we clamor for change at NIRA...

Visit(?) Uganda 🦍

In yet another spectacular example of misplaced priorities, Uganda's government plans to further trim its tourism sector budget. This tweet encapsulates our (petty) sentiments on this matter.

Beyond Borders

Africa 🌍

Fight or Flight 🇬🇶

Try to read this without laughing: The son of the president of Equatorial Guinea was held for attempting to steal a plane belonging to the national airline. He was arrested by the Vice President, who—wait for it—is also a son of the President. How did you do?

Nigeria set for presidential polls 🇳🇬

After years of accusing President Buhari of only returning to Nigeria to renew his visa, Africa’s richest and most populous state will soon hold presidential elections. Since Nigerian artists occupy ¾ of your Spotify playlists, the least you can do is wish them well. The race is down to three major candidates out of a total of 18.

DR Congo church blast 🇨🇩

At least 14 people were killed and scores more injured after a bomb went off during a church service in Kasindi, Democratic Republic of Congo. The horrific incident was later claimed by Islamic State. Peace is elusive, but if anyone deserves it, it is the DRC.

The Energy gift that keeps on giving 👐🏾

Not lacking in natural resources to dole out, DR Congo awarded three Lake Kivu natural gas blocks to US and Canadian companies. Production could start as early as 2024.

The rest of the world 🌏

DAVOS 🇨🇭

The highest concentration of world leaders, billionaires, heads of international NGOs, celebrities, and Nobel laureates per square meter was hosted by the World Economic Forum (WEF) this week (16/01 - 20/01) in the snow-capped highlands of Switzerland. If you harbor any ill intentions to "eat the rich", you'll scarcely get a better opportunity than Davos.

What's WEF and why should you care?

WEF is a not-for-profit foundation founded in 1971 that uses stakeholder engagement to unite the most influential people in the world to shape global, regional, and industry agendas. The annual meeting in Davos is WEF's most high-profile meeting.

Despite the criticism WEF attracts for being a darling of large private corporations, WEF's convening power and influence on global trends and agendas demands attention (and googling).

On the agenda this year: climate change, inflation, international conflicts, threats from technology, plus the prospect of these issues combining into a “polycrisis” (like wars over limited natural resources caused by climate change)

Resignations and respect 🇳🇿

Jacinta Ardern, the Prime Minister of New Zealand, will resign after her 5½-year term ends on February 7 this year. As Ugandans, we double triple quadruple fact-checked this piece, sighed, and said: "must be nice."

Procrastination corner 💤

• This video of the Boston Dynamics robot will either fascinate you or fill you with existential dread

• The kind of guide you'll save for the rest of your life

• 10 powerful visuals about psychology and life

Have a good week!

— Too Long; Didn’t Read (TLDR)

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