Good morning ☀

Inflation on a tightrope, mandatory dustbins in your car, and back-to-school-induced traffic jams. Never a dull week in the Pearl of Africa.

Let's do this 🚀

— Gloria Mbabazi, Shem Opolot

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The Bank of Uganda (BoU) maintained the Central Bank Rate (CBR) at 10%, claiming the rate is still effective to control the rise in inflation, bring stability to the lending rate and exchange rate, and drive economic growth. Let us know when this translates into a lower price of local chicken in the market.

John bought 1 orange from a market vendor at UGX 100 last year but when he returned to the market in 2023, the same orange cost UGX 300. John experienced inflation.

The central bank rate (CBR) is the interest rate at which the grown-up bank of all the banks in the country (the central bank) lends money to smaller banks.

How does the CBR affect inflation? Sam lends Peter UGX 1000 on the condition that Peter pays him back UGX 2000 in a week. Peter takes that UGX 1000 and lends UGX 500 to the market vendor on the condition that the market vendor pays him back UGX 2000 in a week. A week later, if Sam lends Peter another UGX 1000 on the condition that Peter pays him back UGX 5000 in a week, Peter will cringe and turn around and ask the market vendor to pay back even more in a week. The more money Peter asks for, the less likely it is for the market vendor to borrow more money from him. Since borrowing money from Peter is too expensive, and the market vendor needs money, the market vendor lowers the prices of their produce to encourage their customers to buy. However, if Sam asks Peter to pay back less money in a week, Peter will also turn around and ask the market vendor to pay back less money, and the market vendor, now flush with cash and low on desperation, raises the prices in his shop. And that’s how John finds a price hike on his favorite oranges. Sam is the central bank, Peter is a smaller bank, the market vendor is a business, and John is a regular John like you.

In the diplomatic equivalent of closing the curtains so your neighbors can't see what you're up to, the Uganda government terminated the operations of the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights (OHCHR) in Uganda. It might serve our government well to know the loud shouts and screams from inside the house can’t be quelled by simply drawing the curtains.

The National Environment Management Authority (NEMA), which you might remember from your Social Studies homework, not for the fulfillment of their mandate, published new environmental regulations portending exorbitant fines. Most notably, driving without a dustbin in your car will attract a fine of UGX 6 million. And no, smuggling your ex into the trunk of your car doesn’t count. The new regulations are expected to take effect on April 1, 2023.

Words no man wants to hear. As the special parliamentary investigation of the NSSF board rolls on like tumbleweed in a Western film, we’re getting A LOT more than we bargained for. This week’s inquisition featured finger-pointing, sweaty palms, accusations of nepotism, and contradicting statements from former director, Richard Byarugaba and his Chief Finance Officer, Steven Mwanje regarding UGX 1.8 billion that prompted the confiscation of their phones by the Criminal Investigations Directorate (CID) for forensic analysis.

This week you probably listened to the radio a lot because you were stuck in traffic as students returned to school. The traffic deadlock at dawn when school resumes always resurrects conversations about student learning hours, creating school districts, exorbitant school fees, and a dated education system that funnels its attendants into unemployment in a cruel life game of snakes and ladders. One thing’s for sure—all this talk makes for effective birth control.

The more things change, the more they stay the same. King Henry VIII’s contestation of the Catholic Church’s rigid stance on marriage birthed the Church of England in the 16^th century. Almost 500 years later, the Church of England resolved to sanction same-sex marriage, forcing the Church of Uganda to file for divorce.

🇿🇦 Long live Supa Mega: Rapper Kiernan Jarryd Forbes, aka AKA, one of Africa’s biggest trailblazers in the music industry, died in a shooting on Friday night in Durban, South Africa. AKA will be remembered for his showmanship and deft lyricism. May he rest in peace.

🇰🇪 Dollar shortage: Kenyan firms have listed a dollar shortage among a litany of challenges affecting their expansion and revenues

🇳🇬 Money Mayhem: The Nigerian Supreme Court suspended the deadline to stop the use of old Naira notes as a counter-inflation (there’s that word again) measure after a cash crisis and scramble ensued as Nigerians flocked banking halls and the adjoining streets to exchange their old notes for new ones.

🇹🇷🇸🇾 Turkey/Syria earthquake: More than 34,000 people have been killed and tens of thousands injured after 7.8- and 7.5-magnitude earthquakes struck Turkey and Syria on Monday, February 6. The quakes are among the worst disasters in the last 100 years.

💊 Drug bust: New Zealand authorities intercepted 81 bales of cocaine on the way to Australia. With a street value of around $316 million, the bust was a sunken profit ship for the drug business and a win for the war on drugs.

👑 GOAT James: In the wee hours of Wednesday morning (EAT), Lebron James became the all-time leading scorer in NBA history, eclipsing Kareem Abdul Jabbar’s 39-year record. Here’s a cool graphic showing ALL his buckets.

🤖 The AI Olympics: Google launched their ChatGPT competitor, Bard; Bing is attempting a comeback like our ex via a Microsoft-led ChatGPT-infused Bing search; and Chinese tech giant Baidu confirmed its own chatbot, “Ernie Bot” drops in March. Let the AI games begin.

Still don’t know what ChatGPT or this mess is about? Let AI explain it to you.

🔍 Off to a Bard start: Google’s parent company, Alphabet lost $100 billion in market value after their new AI chatbot, Bard made a factual error during its maiden public demo.

🍃 Tech layoffs: This week, Zoom joined other tech giants Google, Meta, Dell, Amazon, Salesforce, etc in laying off a significant number of their global staff (20%). Between 2022 and 2023, approximately 261,653 employees have been laid off from 1,384 tech companies as the fast-growing tech bubble that skied during the pandemic burst.

🧵 Thread count: Twitter expanded their character limit from 280 characters to 4000 characters for Twitter Blue subscribers. As if the slew of threads from dilettantes weren’t annoying enough.

⚽ Former Uganda Cranes captain, Ibrahim Sekagya takes over the head coaching job at New York Red Bulls II

⚡ Umeme shareholders eye UGX 1 trillion payout

💊 Police, NDA raid Pastor Kayanja’s church and seize fake veterinary drugs

🎸 Eddy Kenzo, became the first Ugandan to be nominated for a Grammy but lost

🦌 Uganda wildlife numbers soar due to enhanced protection

🥇 President Museveni received the highest military decoration in Uganda for his role in the creation of the UPDF

🔌 UETCL got a new boss

💰 Ugandan startups raised $70 million in 2022

🤲🏾 Government to recover UGX 46 billion from 4,860 student loan beneficiaries

🚰 Government completes water treatment plant in Bugolobi

✈️ Traveling in East Africa is expensive

Q: What 5-letter word typed in all capital letters can be read the same upside down?

The answer is below

💺 The safest seat on a plane

🐦 You must watch this video on the tiniest bird you’ve seen

📷 The best photographers from 2022

📎 Make your Google Doc more pleasant to read

Answer: SWIMS

Have a good week!

— Too Long; Didn’t Read (TLDR)

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