🏦 Straight outta the World Bank

Hi! Welcome to TLDR Weekly! You’re reading this because you probably stumbled upon this post somewhere on the internet instead of where it should be—in your inbox. But no worries; we can fix that.

Why should you subscribe?

1. You don’t have time to read newspapers

2. You like to be informed

3. You usually find the news long and boring

4. We curate all the top stories from Uganda and the rest of the world into one email, which we send to you every Monday (hopefully, it finds you well)

5. We will occasionally make you laugh

6. It’s brief

If this sounds good to you, click the subscribe button below, add your email, read the welcome email from us in your inbox (check your spam folder or Promotion tabs, too), and follow ALL the instructions. This is important so you don’t miss future posts.

Welcome to TLDR Weekly, the best way to consume the news. If you're reading this, it’s too late you either subscribed or someone forwarded it to you. If you fit into the latter camp and want to subscribe, then click on the shiny button below:

Good morning 🌤️ On Thursday last week, Virgin Galactic flew its first commercial flight to space with an 80-year-old British Olympian and a mother-daughter duo from the Caribbean aboard. This milestone means at least three things:

1. You’re broke

2. Richard Branson joined his billionaire bros, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk, in the space tourism business

3. The next time your lover asks for space, the trip will cost $450,000

Also, to celebrate the 50th anniversary of hip-hop this past weekend, we smuggled some popular rap lyrics into this week’s stories. So…b*tch put down them tabloids 🔥

—Gloria Mbabazi, Shem Opolot

Advertise with us.

Headlines

🏦 Straight outta the World Bank

First things first, rest in peace, our World Bank deal! The World Bank gave Uganda the pink slip by suspending funding for future projects due to human rights violations following the enactment of an anti-homosexuality law. The World Bank, which stated that the anti-homosexuality law contradicts its values of inclusivity and non-discrimination, deployed a team to Uganda to review the bank’s portfolio and discuss additional measures to protect sexual and gender minorities. President Museveni fired back by saying Uganda will develop with or without loans and calling the decision “unfortunate.” Wondering how all this affects you? This tweet and this one give you a hint.

🔑 Cash, coups and confrontations

Dealing with a case of "Mo' Money, Mo' Problems," the FDC party is divided into two factions: the Nakulabye (HQ) faction of Amuriat and Nandala and the Katonga Road forces of Ssemujju Nganda and Erias Lukwago, led by party founder and man who has been jailed more than your favorite rapper—Kizza Besigye. Besigye claimed dirty money exchanged hands between the State and Nandala whom he also accused of staging a coup. In retaliation, the HQ faction stripped Hon. Ssemujju of his party position as Chief Whip, replaced him with Yusuf Nsibambi, and forwarded Ssemujju, Lukwago, and four other party members to the disciplinary committee.

🍽️ MVPs (Most Valuable Plates)

The government is proceeding with its plan to add new digital number plates to Ugandans’ list of 99 problems (See our previous writeup). The rollout of the Intelligent Transport Monitoring System plates will begin in October 2023, starting in Kampala and gradually expanding to other areas of the country. New vehicle and motorcycle owners will pay Shs. 714,000 for the digital number plates, while already registered road users must pay Shs. 150,000 and Shs. 50,000 for vehicles and motorcycles, respectively.

🇰🇪 Kenya

After a year of political drama and on-and-off strikes, Ruto and Odinga plan to finally meet. Ruto, who’s watching the throne jealously, is ready to chat about everything on the menu except the main course—the sharing of power.

🇷🇼 Rwanda

Rwanda genocide survivors were disappointed when the UN halted the trial of Felicien Kabuga, an alleged financier of the genocide, due to health reasons. Kabuga is nearly 90 and has dementia.

🇹🇿 Tanzania

Tanzania's court green-lit the UAE port deal, brushing dirt constitutional concerns off their shoulders. Under the deal, the multinational logistics company, DP World, headquartered in Dubai, will initially run the port of Dar es Salaam, with the potential to expand to other ports in mainland Tanzania based on further negotiations.

Other headlines

Grey list and why Uganda is not getting off it soon

Airtel Uganda to list on the stock market

10,000 Ugandan national IDs confiscated from foreigners

Museveni reverses directive on government ads

Archbishop asks court to dismiss Luwero petition

Jane Goodall returning to support Uganda's conservation movement

Bujagali dam tax waiver by Museveni rattles civil society

Circus involved in modern weddings sending couples to URSB office

❤️ Share TLDR Weekly online or via WhatsApp, Twitter, or email.

AD: The “f’s” in “Office” can stand for fun.

If being employee of the month isn’t attractive to you, saving tons of time ought to be. Pearl AI can help with both of those things.

Beyond Borders 

🌍️ Africa

🇳🇪 War and peace. Russia, the world’s leading expert on peace and conflict resolution, warned against military intervention in Niger, saying it would lead to prolonged confrontation and destabilization of the Sahel region. Relatedly, since the junta shunned ECOWAS’ demand for the reinstatement of Niger’s democratically elected leader, ECOWAS took that as a sign that the junta wanted all the smoke and ordered the deployment of its standby force to intervene in Niger to restore order and democracy. However,…the force, which has been directed to activate immediately, lacks the commensurate funding, participation, and troop numbers to, you know, activate. In response to ECOWAS’ threat, the junta in Niger reportedly threatened to kill deposed President Mohamed Bazoum if neighboring countries attempted military intervention.

🇹🇳 🇱🇾 Migrant malady. Tunisia and Libya stopped burying their heads in the desert sands and agreed to Love Theirz by sharing the responsibility of sheltering the hundreds of stranded migrants at their borders. Tunisia will take 126 migrants, while Libya will take the remaining 150. The migrants, who mostly hail from Sub-Saharan Africa, had been abandoned by Tunisian authorities in the desert area of Ras Jedir. The Mediterranean Sea crossing from Tunisia to Europe has become increasingly dangerous, with over 1,800 deaths recorded this year alone.

Other headlines

Central African Republic scraps term limits

Multichoice leaves Malawi | Zuma released after a brief prison return

Amazon Summit: African nations to protect rainforests

WFP slowly resumes food aid to Ethiopia after months of criticism

The ‘hanging libraries’ of Nigeria: How a book drive is exciting pupils

Rwanda, Jordan strengthen bilateral ties

🗺️ The rest of the world

🇵🇰 Pakistan’s problems. A week ago, a suicide bombing believed to be the product of tensions between ISIS and pro-Taliban groups killed 54 people and injured 200. (See our previous writeup). Last weekend, a derailed passenger train killed at least 30 people and injured more than 100. And most recently, Imran Khan, the former Prime Minister of Pakistan, was sentenced to three years in prison for corruption charges. The arrest followed a no-confidence vote against Khan in 2018, but Khan’s persistent approval ratings (60%) ensure Political division in Pakistan is ballin outta control. In Pakistan’s 75-year modern history, no prime minister has completed a full five-year term. We don’t know whether to be jealous or concerned.

🇺🇸 🇨🇳 Biden said knock you out. In an attempt to kneecap China’s tech boom and perpetuate the long-standing ‘frenmity’ between the US and China, President Biden announced restrictions on American investment in certain Chinese tech companies, particularly those developing semiconductors and quantum computers. The restrictions will start next year, following a period of public comment, and will be enforced mainly on venture capital and private equity funds.

🛢 Global oil demand spikes. We know going green is all the rage right now, but if you lean a little bit closer, you’ll notice oil is here to stay—at least for the foreseeable future. The International Energy Agency (IEA) reported that global oil demand hit a record high due to increased air travel, Chinese economic activity, and power generation. While the IEA revised down its forecasts for next year, it's reportedly apparent that reducing oil consumption by 2030 won't be enough to reach net-zero emissions targets.

❤️ Share TLDR Weekly online or via WhatsApp, Twitter, or email.

Nn’ebigenderako

Politics and Government

China and Russia send warships near Alaska

The US-Iran prisoner swap

Deadly wildfires in Hawaii killed at least 36 people

Ecuador presidential candidate assassinated

Business and Finance

A new postpartum depression pill in the US

PayPal launches a stablecoin

Tesla CFO resigns after working with Musk for 13 years (which, apparently, would feel like 50 years for anyone else)

WeWork Won’tWork

Neuralink, Elon Musk’s brain chip tech startup, raises $280Mn

Science and Technology

The sound of phone’s dial pad is enough for you to be hacked

A second successful nuclear fusion reaction

The most important unanswered issue in climate science

Sports

Simone Biles’ triumphant return to competitive gymnastics

Women’s World Cup update

Lifestyle and Entertainment

Tory Lanez jailed 10 years

Take a look inside Cher’s home (It’s up for sale if you’re looking)

The history of hip-hop: a deep dive

Procrastination corner

Games and Puzzles

From Braingle.

For each of the following, use the clue words to help you find three words that are linked to each other through their last two letters and the first two letters of the subsequent word.
The first word's last two letters are the same as the first two letters of the second word, and the second word's last two letters are the same as the first two letters of the third word.
Example: exchange / exit / come back

Answer: traDE / DEpartuRE / REturn

1. less than less / sneaking around / process mentally
2. purplish red / it takes two / departed
3. bean curd / after today / save
4. stinging insect / make waves / get smaller

Answer at the bottom

Our picks

💰 Visualizing the $105Tn world economy

💰 How money laundering works

🐷 The next time you want to buy pork for an afternoon BBQ, call +256703001409. Trust us, you won’t regret it*

⭕ Hidden messages in popular logos

*This is sponsored advertising content

Games answer

Answer:

1. least / stealth / think
2. magenta / tango / gone
3. tofu / future / rescue
4. wasp / splash / shrink

Have a good week!

— Too Long; Didn’t Read (TLDR)

❤️ Share TLDR Weekly online or via WhatsApp, Twitter, or email.